The Misadventures of Sibeh Sian

You can call me Sian. Sibeh Sian.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

The long and short about The Poly Gathering Part IV


When old friends meet after not having met for a long while, the sort of questions they ask are more or less the same. How is your job, when are you getting married, how the hell did you get so fat and ugly. That sort of thing.

Not Ah Sai though. The first thing she said when we met at Orchard MRT was “You are Sibeh Sian right?!?!?!?”

I am sibeh sian indeed. Literally.

Anyway, to cut a long story short, Ah Sai is Adrenaline. Which means I can’t bitch about her openly anymore, not unless I want my deepest darkest secrets to spring forth from her blog. But then again, I don’t have much to complain about Adrenaline because she is such an intelligent, generous, kind, beautiful and fantabulous sort of friend. Heh.

Or at least, that’s what I wanted to do initially. People, I have a very important announcement to make here: Sibeh Sian is going to be a New Man, starting from this very instant, no more procrastination. I shall no longer be manipulated by evil superiors, scheming Sweet Young Things masquerading as ‘Financial Advisers’, or bloggers with bully-like tendencies who threatens you with what they know about you in Real Life. Yes, I am a Man reborn.

To prevent Adrenaline from spoiling my reputation by telling you all my deepest and darkest secrets, I shall take the initiative and counteract her Rumors of Mass Destruction with a pre-emptive strike: I will tell you people about my deepest and darkest secrets before she does.

Here it goes.

(The following section is not really for the under-aged. Proceed at your own discretion)

Question #01: What is your greatest sexual fantasy?
Women falling themselves over me while screaming “Impregnate me, oh Monsieur Sian! Impregnate me!” And I will brush them off with a very cool, “Not today darlings, I’m having my period.”

Question #02: Who is your greatest sexual fantasy?
Rei Ayanami

Question #03: Which is the sexiest part of your body?
My bulging, hard, and perpetually glistering nostrils.

Question #04: How did it felt when you popped the cherry for the very first time?
I didn’t quite like it. If you ask me, cherries taste a bit like almonds, but yuckier.

Question #05: Do you harbor any secret fantasies of your colleagues?
Yes, I do. I secretly fantasize about me suddenly becoming the boss and firing Ms Tan. And then rehiring her as the new cleaning auntie. Haha.

Question #06: Have you ever slept naked before?
Yes, I did. There was once when I fell asleep at the toilet bowl while shitting after a shower.

Question #07: What is the naughtiest thing you have ever said to anyone?
Teacher, I forgot to do my homework.

I hope your voyeuristic curiosity has been satisfied.

With Love,
Sibeh Sian


Ok, this update is in response to the queries about what we did that night. Frankly, the four of us (another two couldn’t make it at the last minute) didn’t do much except eating.

I have no idea why but my brilliant suggestion of dining at Burger King was shot down by Adrenaline. She must really hate me because she dissed my follow-up suggestion of KFC too. Then she rejected my final offer of Pizza Hut because she claims that she wants to remain slim for her coming wedding in December.

We finally ended up at this bistro near Borders, where she ordered two ten-inch pizzas. What the?!?!?!

After gossiping about who-and-who’s and reminiscing about our glorious tradition of skipping lectures to play 大老二 during our poly days, we soon got hungry again. We made our way to Café Cartel where we ordered a big-ass platter of snacks, which was gone in fifteen minutes. This was followed up by this really huge 10-scoop-ice-cream-with-cookies-&-brownies-&-chocolate-fudge thingy:

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Very, very sinful thing

Which we also took just 15 minutes to finish:

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Apparently, my friends were not very happy with my repeated requests for photos

Adrenaline? Staying slim for her wedding?

Ha. Ha. Ha.


  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 2:05:00 AM, Blogger SaltPop. said…

    Wow, that was ..............sensual? -.-

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 8:54:00 AM, Blogger bochup said…

    ewwww naked. ewww shitting... ewww! my mind!!! the image!!! arrrgh...

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 9:14:00 AM, Blogger Green Ogre said…

    I hope you suceed in your New Man thingy. However, I am mildly disturbed. For a long time Rei Ayanami was the wallpaper for my comp, the wallpaper and screensaver for my mobile phone and I had these thing for waifish girls like her.

    But she's so cool right?

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 9:35:00 AM, Blogger Beth said…

    Actually Singapore is v small one... Chances are, you will know someone who knows someone who also knows you. So in Singapore, better not play the fool, bitch too much abt other fellow Singaporeans.
    Just be a nice harmless person. Your life will be less complicated.

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 9:47:00 AM, Blogger pj said…

    i expected worse.

    anyhow, nothing beats u farting in sef's face. yeah.

    also, being a nice harmless person makes life so boring..

    be nasty! heehee. :)

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 10:03:00 AM, Blogger Sibeh Sian said…

    Saltpop: Exactly. I wanted to made this entry R(A) initially!

    Bochup: You've never tried that before?!?! You should! Very cooling!

    Green Ogre: Tell me about it. I even had a 1000 piece puzzle of her hanging pretty in my room once.

    Beth: I am quite nice, quite harmless, but my life is very complicated. :(

    PJ: Actually! I resolve to be a bad boy. WIll start by farting in everybody's face.

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 10:04:00 AM, Blogger LemonCloud said…

    I think Adrenaline should be able to come up with more dark secrets of yours.

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 11:23:00 AM, Blogger Sunflower said…

    I agree with Lemoncloud,

    Sian, where you need to change? To impress Adrenaline, Yes? Say YES please!

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 12:35:00 PM, Blogger twinkies said…

    Hey, you didn't report on the venue of the gathering. Was it BK?

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 12:56:00 PM, Blogger Lawrence & Alicia said…

    Nice try.. :P

    Anyway where did u guys have dinner that day?

    - Alicia

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 7:55:00 PM, Blogger dave said…


  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 8:06:00 PM, Blogger Sibeh Sian said…

    LemonCloud: There is really nothing interesting about my deep and dark secrets at all! I'm a homely boy, remember? Heh.

    Sunflower: Yes! YES! Yeah baby yeah!

    Twinkles + Alicia: Unfortunately, my BK idea was roundly shot down. We dined at this bistro thingy at Borders, before further fattening ourselves at Cafe Cartel.

    Dave: My friends wanted to choke-slam me when I told them jokes that night leh.

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 8:35:00 PM, Blogger alien73 said…

    What is pop the cherry?

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 9:05:00 PM, Blogger antisocialfreak said…

    after reading ur post, images of hard, glistening nostrils keep popping into my mind... thanks leh :|

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 10:24:00 PM, Blogger Jaschocolate said…

    Hahaa... funny answers loh...

  • At Tuesday, July 11, 2006 10:33:00 PM, Blogger Sunflower said…

    Sian, I know why Adrenaline hate you to the max liao.... you huh... very bad lor.... really bad...

    haiz, how can you say this to her, "Adrenaline? Staying slim for her wedding?"

    Adrenaline i scold him for you...!@#$%$%^&*(*

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 12:14:00 AM, Blogger eileen` said…

    i agree with antisocialfreak. the bulging, hard, and perpetually glistening nostrils image is really quite disturbing. i might just get a nightmare tonight. thanks ah, sian. =)

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 12:17:00 AM, Blogger Adrenaline said…

    Firstly, thank you Sunflower. Hee ...

    Secondly, oh sbs, u so underestimate me. There are soooo much more things i can say about u :D

    tune in to my blog very soon. hehe ... im currently compiling the list.

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 12:19:00 AM, Blogger Siphiwe said…

    i agree with antisocialfreak. the bulging, hard, and perpetually glistening nostrils image is really quite disturbing. i might just get a nightmare tonight. thanks ah, sian. =)an. =)

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 1:02:00 AM, Blogger SaltPop. said…

    Eat in moderation. xD

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 1:04:00 AM, Blogger Adrenaline said…

    eh, u forgot to mention we specially ordered "no whipped cream" on that ice-cream hor. So it's not as fat as people think ok.

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 10:14:00 AM, Blogger Sibeh Sian said…

    Aileen: Er... er... it means to eat a cherry! You know, like "I popped an M&M into my mouth and that feels good!"

    ASF: You are welcome :D!

    JasChoc: Argh! They were meant to be serious!

    Sunflower: Haha, I'm using reverse psychology! I'm also trying to convince her to join the StanChart marathon at the end of the year.

    Eileen: So did you get any nightmares? Heh ;)

    Adrenaline: Oh shit. Can I make peace now? Please?

    Siphiwe: I'm seeing double!

    Saltpop: That's what I wanted lor! They were so greedy, tsk tsk....

    Adrenaline: They also forgot our caramel sauce. Heh.

  • At Wednesday, July 12, 2006 7:42:00 PM, Blogger Adrenaline said…

    eh, how come the first pic show my fingers wif the "V" sign?? i thot i was pointing with my middle finger?? u photoshopped the pic issit??

  • At Thursday, July 13, 2006 10:14:00 AM, Blogger Sibeh Sian said…

    Adrenaline: You think I very free issit??!?! Anyway, I took two "before" pics, and posted the one without you flashing the finger. I think you forgot because you are senile :)


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