The long and short about Valentine’s Day III

When Nerd asked me out on Valentine’s Day, I thought it was a great idea. He was out of luck with love and I was out of luck with work, and since we couldn’t get any dates with anybody else it seems perfectly logical that we stick to each other.

I had no idea how wrong I was.

The evening started on a completely wrong note because he turned up for the date in a pink shirt. Not that I have anything against the color (for the record I prefer strawberry Yan Yan and Hello Pandas), but when I saw him my gaydar simply went into overdrive. It turns out that the shirt was given to him by his Heartless Girl before she decided to dump him, and he wanted to commemorate the memories of her by wearing it on Valentine’s Day and pretend that he’s on a date with her. A sentimental man he is, that Nerd.

He managed to convince me that KFC is not the best place to celebrate Valentine’s, so we ended up at this restaurant somewhere in Clarke Quay. Everything was fine until he started reminiscing about the good and not so good times he had with Heartless Girl. Which was ok for me until he starting sobbing.


Nerd: I really miss XXXXX so much! I really can’t live without her!

Me: Oh stop it! You promised not to talk about your ex in front of me already!

Nerd: But I really can’t! Boo hoo hoo. . . .


I decided to give desserts a miss because I realized that the other diners were casting weird stares at our table.

We were both bloated by the very generous servings of fish n chips, so we decided to take a slow stroll along the riverside. I was jealous disgusted because no matter where I turn, I’ll get confronted with the sight of lovey-dovey couples armed with big ass bouquets and heart-shaped balloons in their hands. I have no idea why, but despite having Nerd at my side, the flower selling girls still pestered me to buy a stalk of rose from them. I laughed nervously and thought they were crazy.

I was understandably horrified when I realized that Nerd was getting one. What the?!?!?!

After the flower selling girls went away giggling, Nerd said he wanted to give his lost relationship one last chance, and will surprise his Heartless Girl by giving her that stalk of rose that evening.

On our way to the train station, we saw the reverse bungee thingy, and this crazy thought went across our minds. We are both at the lowest point of our lives, and we desperately wanted to make a change. We know that we can only change things by confronting our fears, and thus decided to start first by confronting our great fear of heights.

They strapped us up, and when we were facing the sky just before the launch with all the dry ice around us, several things flashed before my mind: my mum, my job, and Sushi Eating Friend. And before I knew it, I surged into the sky like an eagle who rediscovered his wings. I also nearly peed in my pants.

I think Nerd had a nastier time because he started puking his fish n chips out after we landed. I was quite worried, and helped him down the aisle with tissue over his mouth while clutching that stupid stalk of rose.

For some unknown reason, the people around us started clapping.

I think I’m not going to visit Clarke Quay again any time soon.


With Love,
Sibeh Sian