The long and short about The Unwritten Rules In Singapore

Updated!


This entry is inspired by this entry.

As a true-blue Singaporean born and bred in Toa Payoh, I do think that there are several ‘unwritten’ social rules here in our beloved island. To help our overseas friends to understand us better, I have come up with a list of such unwritten rules in daily social settings:


Unwritten Rule in the MRT:
Scenario:
You are happily napping on your seat on your way to the office, as depicted in the following illustration:





When the train reached City Hall, your fellow commuters left the train, and you are the only person left in the cabin with Commuter A to your left:





According to the unwritten rules of the MRT, you should immediately shift to the furthest possible seat:





Explanation:
Singapore is a very small country, and most of us are enclosed in tiny HBDs. We are thus very protective of any tiny space around us, so Commuter A might mistake your refusal to shift seats as a sign of aggression.

The big question is: why can’t Commuter A shift his/her position instead? The reason is because Commuter A was sitting next to the train exit, which gives him/her the Right of Way. Or something like that.


Unwritten Rule in the Lift:
Scenario:
After the treacherous train ride, you finally reached your office building and managed to squeeze into the company lift:





The lift reached level 10, and everyone exits the lift except for you and Lift Taker A:





If you have paid attention to what I said previously, you will know that the correct thing to do now will be to shift to the position furthest possible away from Lift Taker A”





Explanation:
Again, personal space is the key reason why you should move away. But the situation is made trickier in a lift if you consider the following scenarios:

- If you are female and Lift Taker A is male, Lift Taker A will inevitably think you are trying to hit on him.
- If you are male and Lift Taker A is female, Lift Taker A will inevitably think you are trying to hit on her. Or worse, she might scream molest.
- If you are male and Lift Taker A is male, Lift Taker A will inevitably think you are trying to hit on him. You might end up screaming molest. Or maybe the two of you might be very happy :)


Unwritten Rule in the Loo:
(Hey that rhymed, haha)
Scenario:
You reached your level, and decided to take a quick pee before slaving your day at the office. All the cubicles and urinals were occupied except for Urinal 2, so you did your business there:





While unzipping, the colleagues to your right finished their business and left the loo:





You are probably thinking to yourself “Aha! The correct thing to do now is move to Urinal 4, which is the furthest.”





Unfortunately, that is the incorrect answer. The correct thing to do is to shift to Urinal 3:





Explanation:
The reason why you should not shift to Urinal 4 is because after Colleague A is done with peeing, he will (hopefully) proceed to the basin to wash his hands. By switching to Urinal 3 instead, he will not be able to peep at you.

Now the big question is what if the colleagues have left while you are mid-stream?

The answer is of course, to pause mid-stream and switch to Urinal 3. We Singaporeans are that anal. Heh.


With Love,
Sibeh Sian


Update:

This update has got nothing to with this entry whatsoever!

If you’ve noticed, there’s a new picture just below mine at the sidebar. That’s Alan Johnston, Gaza correspondent from the BBC who was unfortunately kidnapped in the turbulent region since 12 March this year.

His family and friends are keeping their fingers crossed that he will return to them soon. Click on his picture to find out how you can help!