The long and short about The Dates

Ok, I am finally free and composed enough to talk about the shocking events of Saturday.

Being a Man of Action, I took much pain to ensure that I was well prepared for the date: my Batik shirt was neatly pressed, my hair carefully slicked back, and I even brought along some Kit Kat for Office Bimbo.

Unfortunately, the only thing she said when we met up was that she’s dieting, and even if she wasn’t she only takes expensive chocolates from Godiva. Walau.

Anyway, I have no idea how this happened, but our seats were just next to Nerd and his KFC Girl! I was of course very happy and wanted to sit next to Nerd, but Office Bimbo insisted on having that seat (I think it was because it was more to the middle of the screen), so I let her.

I think Office Bimbo was bullshitting about dieting because she kept asking for Nerd’s nuts and cola throughout the show. She was also very selfish because she ignored me when I asked her to pass me some of Nerd’s nuts. Too much sia. In the end I just ate my Kit Kat, which fortunately was very delicious :)

But one redeeming point about Office Bimbo was that she was very friendly. Even though it was our date, she graciously invited Nerd and KFC Girl to have dinner together when the show was over. But I think that Nerd was more interested about having a private dinner with his KFC Girl because they actually sneaked away while we were in the loo and refused to pick up our calls thereafter. Very naughty ah, that Nerd.

Eventually, Office Bimbo and I ended up at KFC alone. I was afraid the chicken was making her nauseous because she didn’t spoke a word throughout the dinner, until she suddenly broke the silence.


Office Bimbo: Why, Sian, why?!?!?!? Why isn’t the object of my affection paying attention to me? Am I not attractive enough?!?!?

Me: No lah no lah, you are very attractive one! (I’m not a cheekopek but my eyes wondered a while to her plunging neckline when she said that, aiyoh)

Office Bimbo: Then why :(?

Me: Hmmm. . . . Ok, I usually joke too much for my own good, but I am going to be very serious for a while ok?

Me: *clears throat*

Me: Bimbo, I am not ready to take our relationship to the next level because if truth is to be told, there is someone deep inside my heart I can’t let go off yet.

Me: Do you understand what I’m saying?

Office Bimbo: . . . .

Office Bimbo: . . . . I was talking about Nerd, you dick-head.


And that’s the long and short about how I embarrassed myself thoroughly over the weekend.


With Love,
Sibeh Sian